Modern method for you!

I’ve just received the most extraordinary email.

Subject: Hi, I think you’d be interested what is new! modern method for you! You are not frustrated total
Date: 15-03-2013 16:48
From: “Mike Westgarth”

Now I’m always interested in what is new and I’m no stranger to modern methods, so I can see how I might be frustrated total if I didn’t listen to what “Mike Westgarth” has to say.

Good day! I just read a cool way to be cool in bed! But do not write to anyone about this method to anyone

A cool way to be cool in bed?  The mind boggles.  It must somehow combine an edgy fashion sense with a practical and efficacious method of reducing one’s core temperature when retiring for the evening.  

Perhaps an Oriental fan with a Skrillex motif?  

An air conditioning unit that plays One Direction songs?

Ice cubes in the shape of The Fonz?

I like that “Mike Westgarth” is so enthused about this exciting modern method that he’s specifically forbidden me from writing to anyone about this method to anyone.  And there I was about to dash off a missive to my Auntie Ethel.  

You know, this principle is used sex stars!

Fuck no!  Really?  “Mike Westgarth” now you are making a fuck of me!  Hilarity of fun!  Your talk is strange of broken!

Seriously Mike.  Stop it.

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